Three Across: A Brief Note to the Guy in 4B (The Middle Seat of Flight #644)

I know it isn't fun to sit in the middle seat, three across, on a coast-to-coast flight. That's why I opted for the aisle seat and the man on your left opted for the window. Admittedly, you're a big guy and airline seats are tight. Although I'm sensitive to your discomfort, I feel the need to express mine.

Believe me, the grass always seems greener but it's tough sitting three across whether you're in A, B, or C. You didn't ask—-but here are some hints about how you can keep the skies friendly for the people in Seats 4A and 4C next time you're stuck in the middle.

1) Please watch your elbows. Did you realize you inadvertently turned off my movie by changing channels when you leaned on the buttons on our shared armrest? By the time I realized what was happening, I missed the end of the movie. Also, just because you're in the middle, I'm not sure whether you can rightfully claim ownership of both armrests.

2) Many airlines don't provide meals in coach any more, not even for extended flights, but it's a bit much to bring a plate of mussels with linguini on a plane, especially after a pickled seaweed appetizer. With the pungent odors wafting in my direction, I almost felt like I had to reach for the bag in the seat pocket in front of me.

3) I noticed that your knees bouncing up and down periodically. Were you nervous about the flight or are you just an edgy person, in general? Had I known the genesis of the movements, I might have been able to talk you down from whatever.

4) I'm curious. It seems like you had some kind of music synthesizer on your laptop screen. Did you realize that even though you were wearing earphones, the rest of us could hear the same heavy metal sounds?

5) Moving vehicles put me to sleep, too. But it's tough to sit next to someone who is snoring loudly. Next time, try to get a good night's sleep before you fly. Had you given me a choice, I might have opted for the heavy metal for the duration of the flight over the snoring.

6) I hope I'm not making you feel self-conscious; you probably can't do anything about this. But you should know how awkward I felt sitting beside you with your legs spread-eagle at more than a 90-degree angle, encroaching on my limited legroom. Did you consider that first-class might be better for someone of your height and breadth? (I realize, unfortunately, that there was no first-class on our economy flight.)

7) Or, perhaps, you should have realized that you're really a window seat kind of guy…then there would have been a human buffer between us.

Sometimes you read research that confirms what you already know. A recent aviation survey sponsored by HTNB, an infrastructure industry firm, confirms that air travel is "no longer fun" for most travelers. In a random survey of 1000 respondents that allowed for multiple answers, 44 percent called air travel stressful, 41 percent found it frustrating, and 32 percent called it exhausting. For me, the intrigue and romance of the Days of Pan Am are long gone but this trip was the clincher!

Some prior posts on Life Goes Strong about airline travel:

• Fear of Flying: Ten Things You Should Know about Airline Safety
• Seven Ways to Snag a Last-Minute Travel Deal
• Holiday Travel: 10 Simple Tips to Avoid Lost Baggage
• Post-Trip Nasal Drip: How Air Passengers Can Avoid Nasty Colds