Once Bitten, Twice the Fun

TRUE BLOOD, HBO, Sundays, 9 p.m./8 p.m. CT

I realize that, as a middle-class, middle-aged suburban dad, I am not exactly the target audience for vampire shows. They are normally the exclusive province of teenage girls, boys who live in mom's basement and women who have come to realize what boring jerks non-undead men really are when it comes to dating. Not that I don't admire vampires….I'd like to never have to see myself in the mirror again. Plus, it'd be great to look all dark and brooding all the time without being told to improve my attitude. Then again, there are downsides to being a bloodsucker that I couldn't tolerate. They live forever and that's a lot of jury duty they're going to have to serve.

Having said all that, though, I will now contradict my acknowledged aversion to vampires by saying that I really love HBO's True Blood. Sure it's got vampires and werewolves and witches and fairies running all over the place, either killing or having sex with each other (and, in some cases, both at the same time). This is precisely the sort of fantasy stuff that I'd ordinarily enjoy just about as much as a stake through the heart. But there is just something so over-the-top, so unrepentantly energetic about how this show goes about its business that it's virtually impossible to resist its many charms.

Well, now, anyway. Not at first. I remember watching the first few episodes three years ago, thinking this Louisiana-set series about a world where vampires and humans try to coexist was actually pretty boring despite the provocative subject matter. I was then advised by friends to just keep watching and I'd learn to love it....and they were right. Once the multitude of characters was introduced, True Blood soared about 3 miles over the top with its storylines, which made it entertaining enough. The key to success, however, was how it has also managed to make believable people out of very unbelievable characters. I know…it's tough to swallow the idea of identifying with the personal struggles of a woman smitten (and bitten) by two different vampires at the same time or a guy who can shape-shift into a horse or a dog but can't seem to find true love. But it can happen, thanks to some of TV's funniest and most thoughtful writing.

VAMPS, FAIRIES AND WITCHES (OH MY!)

Getting to the point where you can relate to these folks isn't easy. Particularly because there are so many of them. There are enough regular characters in True Blood to fill up the Haunted Mansion. There's Sookie Stackhouse (Anna Paquin), the human-fairy hybrid who can read minds and is just getting over a tempestuous affair with one vampire, Bill (Stephen Moyer), while being pursued by another Eric,  (Alexander Skarsgard). Her brother Jason (Ryan Kwanten) has pretty much been seen as the village idiot (and village guy-who-spends-a-lot-of-time-shirtless-for-good-reason) for years now. Then there's Sookie's friend Tara (Rutina Wesley), who saw her mom and boyfriend possessed by demonic spirits before a vicious vampire decided to try making her his bride. Moody Sam Merlotte (Sam Trammell) runs the local watering hole while still trying to adjust to the fact that he can shift into any animal form he'd like.

And that's not even half the regular cast. With even more joining up this fourth year, where reports are that this will be a season-long battle between witches and vampires for fantasy creature supremacy. (Why didn't the WWE every think of this showdown?) I know how silly that sounds, like your 12-year-old daughter is writing the storylines after a Twilight sleepover with her friends, but somehow it all works. The first six minutes of this season's premiere, with Sookie traveling to the land of the fairies but discovering this isn't your mother's Tinkerbell, is one of the most breathtaking openings to a show I've ever seen. Part summer action blockbuster, part mythological mystery, you can't take your eyes off the screen for a second. No matter where you stand on the matter of the existence of fairies.

PUTTING THE TRUE IN BLOOD

Sure, there is plenty of red meat (as it were) for the folks who enjoy horror shows. There's always a vampire baring his fangs and digging in or a demonic presence potentially turning babies into killers. That's all good for a thrill or two. However, what makes True Blood make the leap from genre series to something anyone can appreciate are the moments that seem very genuine. Sometimes, it's a look of actual love in Eric's eyes when he sees Sookie. Sometimes, it's the thinly veiled satire of the American Vampire League, a group that that is trying to promote vampire-human coexistence with leaders who seem about as trustworthy as politicians' spokespeople. In every episode, there are both sincere and satirical scenes that are worth sticking around for.

It's safe for me to say with no hesitation that I'll never read a Twilight book or watch one of those movies (no matter how much my daughter may eventually insist). I'm never even going to enjoy a heaping bowlful of Count Chocula for breakfast. Undead stuff is just not my cup of O-positive. Vampire projects almost always seem either too silly or soapy. True Blood may be a little of both those things, but it's done with such style that the show will never…wait for it….suck. (Sorry, federal regulations require at least one vampire pun per review of any show with at least one of the creatures in it.)

For more shows you should be watching, check out:

Hot In Cleveland, Happily Divorced

Covert Affairs, The Glades, Leverage

Franklin & Bash

Piers Morgan Tonight, The Rachel Maddow Show, Hannity

Treme

The Bachelorette, Pawn Stars, America's Got Talent

Men Of A Certain Age

Conan, The Tonight Show With Jay Leno, The Late Show With David Letterman

Happy Endings

Saturday Night Live

Glee, The Big Bang Theory, The Mentalist

In Plain Sight